2007-03-25 - 1:34 a.m.
(SOME OF) MY FAVORITE THINGS...
Life is short�and not always razzle-dazzle...so it�s really nice when some part of every day includes something that makes you smile. I try to keep track of them�so that when life gets lame, as it often does, well, �I simply remember my FAY-VOR-IT things�and then I don�t feeeeeel SO bad��Here�s my (partial) list�in no particular order. If you share some of these, let me know�and we can exchange cute, cozy, whiskers-on-kittens e-mails about them..!!
Dark Chocolate-Covered Ginger � Okay�I simply cannot pass the Li-lac Chocolates shop on Jane Street without buying five or six pieces. Also love the chocolate-covered pineapple and peaches. Does this count as a fruit serving?
XM Radio�s �High Standards� station � music from the Great American Songbook, hosted by the sexy-voiced Jonathan Schwartz. Think Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennett, Ella, Judy, Dinah (Shore and Washington), Billy Eckstine, Michael Feinstein, Rosemary Clooney, Diana Krall, Glenn Miller, the Hi-Lo�s, der Bingle. Songs by Cole Porter, Gershwin, Rogers & Hammerstein, Harold Arlen�some of the greatest songs EVER written. Seriously, this is the ONLY thing that keeps me sane during my crazy-busy stress-filled days. I listen to this station all day long. Call me an �easy-listenin� old fart��but I defy you to identify better music from ANY generation. This is America�s BEST.
Matzohs � Hooray for Passover! Yep, this lapsed Catholic girl loves her matzohs, with just a whisper of butter, and accompanied by a cup of hot chocolate. And I love that matzohs appear in the spring�just before Mallomars are phased out in advance of hot summer weather...so, year-round, I always have a favorite snack to look forward to.
Gefilte Fish with Horseradish � And while we�re on the whole Passover kick�I admit to loving this mish-mash of ground-up fish products (whitefish, pike, whatever). And, really, they�re simply low-end quenelles, so what�s not to like?
Bad Blind Dates � Okay, this doesn�t sound like it should be a favorite thing, but a really awful blind date can serve as the basis for many anecdotes and reinforce the fact that I am such a refreshingly sane and decent person as compared to the bulk of humanity. Two recent examples:
1) Perry � said he was 49�but definitely looked closer to 59, which was fine. Hey, everyone lies about their age online, but it should be a believable lie. On paper, we seemed to have lots in common. He spoke fluent Italian, worked in "TV" (allegedly�though it sounded more like web content than �real� TV). Anyway, he was very whiny�from day one. In fact, our first date was postponed because he sprained his neck. I referred him to my client/chiropractor Dr. Joann Weinrib, the genius healer, who worked on him for like two hours!! (Then he whined about her big bill!) We met at San Domenico, very nice�blah, blah, blah. He talked too much about his work, which I totally tuned out. All about �content� and �making deals� and �strategic alliances� and chow, chow, chow. Who cares? And he was a little TOO impressed when I mentioned that my ex-husband was the Emmy-winning Ted Mann of Deadwood and NYPD Blue fame.
Perry: No way! You were married to Ted Mann? You�re kidding, right? I met him once. He�s one of those Stephen Bochco/David Milch guys, right? I think we almost worked together.
Me (thinking to myself, but not saying this out loud): UM, I�m sure you didn�t even get close to working with him. Ted would never have worked with you. In fact, he would have HATED you�cuz you�re such an annoying little shmendrick.
Well, he called me every day for a week. One especially annoying phone call was the day after the Oscars. He went on and on about who wore what. �What did you think of Helen Mirren�s gown?� �Gwyneth Paltrow looked terrible�like a sequined mermaid.� �Penelope Cruz was 'divine'..!� �and I�m thinking, �What are you�a chick? Why are we even having a conversation like THIS?�
One day he called to tell me his neck was still hurting (OY!)�and that he had gone to a physical therapist who recommended that he use a phone headset��you know like Ari Gold on 'Entourage',� he says. Well, since I�ve never seen Entourage, I wouldn�t know�but whatever.
Anyway, we made plans to see a movie on Sunday. Well, come Sunday morning at like 9:30 a.m(!), Perry called to ask if I could meet him for breakfast instead...in, like, an hour...since it turned out he had "lots of work to do later on." I said NO WAY�that I was reading the Sunday Times (actually, I wasn't even AWAKE yet!) and totally didn�t feel like rushing. I asked if we could schedule another date another time.
Perry: �I guess I�m just really not into the dating thing.�
Me: �Then why is your profile on a �dating website?�
Perry: No, I mean, I�m just not into dating�YOU!!
Me: Then why are you calling me EVERY DAY?
Perry: I thought we could be friends.
Me: No, no we can�t. You�re way too ANNOYING and self-centered to be a friend.
Really, how could I be friends with a guy who rings up on Sunday mornings at 9:30 am? And complains endlessly about his goddam neck? And likes to talk about fashion?
2) Date #2 was Carl. A 62-year-old retired lawyer/lobbyist. Attractive. Not quite tall enough. Twice divorced. A grandfather. Says he couldn�t understand these 60-something guys who go after 30-something women. FINALLY (I thought), a guy with his head on straight! We met at Le Singe Vert in Chelsea. However, within 15 minutes he was chatting up the barmaid: �That�s such an unusual top you�re wearing. It looks like a spider�s web.� Blah, blah, blah. She was, like, 24�and totally looking at him like, �Shut up, grandpa�and leave me a big tip.� Well, we lasted two drinks�but all the while, Carl is sorta looking over my head, you know, behind me, and commenting about this girl�s jacket or that one�s ponytail or whatever. He couldn�t have been LESS interested�and in such a RUDE way. Hmph�!!
So, you gotta laugh. And that�s the only reason bad dates are (grudgingly) favorite things...because they reinforce the fact that I never give up...that I keep putting myself out there...that I've got "guts and guile.� (Stolen from an episode of Sex and the City, where Charlotte bounces back from her miscarriage after watching an E! True Hollywood Story about Elizabeth Taylor and her many tragic life encounters, during which ET says, �Now is the time for guts, and guile.�) You go, girl! (I mean...ME go, girl!)
Related to the topic of dating (and guts or, more appropriately, balls, I guess)�a 77-year-old retired New York Post crime reporter had the nerve to respond to my Match.com profile. 77! Is he CRAZY? He was shocked when I told him I knew who he really was, considering that his �user name� was like "Compass Man" or "True Compass" or something. Anyway, I basically told him to find someone his own age. He told me that his late wife was 54, and he had just "gotten used to women in their 50s!" Well, that party's over, pal! Funnily enough�several years back�a NY Post film critic answered my ad! What is it with me and the NY Post? I didn�t go out with him either. He�s creepy looking�and always gives great reviews to soft-core porn. Not my style!
Hudson River Park � even when it�s deserted in the middle of winter, I walk along the promenade and think, �I am SO lucky to live here in the Far West Village��even if undulating glass buildings are about to go up all around me."
Jhumpa Lahiri � Loved her book of short stories�An Interpreter of Maladies. And I loved her novel, The Namesake�AND the recent movie made from that novel. Also love director Mira Nair..and every movie she�s ever made. And I just read� and LOVED�Climbing the Mango Trees by Madhur Jaffrey, which was utterly intoxicating. I guess you could say I�m loving EVERYTHING Indian at the moment. I�m on a total Indian shpong.
HBO�s Extras � starring Ricky Gervais, who created BBC�s The Office, in case you�ve been living under a rock. Season 2 (�Are you havin� a laugh?...Is he havin� a laugh?�) was even more hilarious than Season 1, which hardly seems possible. The episode with Sir Ian McKellen, in which he talks about why he�s such a good actor, was beyond brilliant. And the David Bowie episode (�chubby little loser�) was utterly �cringe-tastic��a Gervais/Extras trademark. If you�ve never seen this show, I urge you to buy the DVDs. Each season is a way-too-short six episodes. I�ve watched them over and over again�and they NEVER stop being hilarious. Here�s a link to the official website. ,
Bill Maher � I love him, and I think he�s scary smart...and spot on. �Nuff said.
Ultimate Manilow CD � Okay, okay�I know what you�re thinking�and I don�t care. This collection just makes me happy. You think you�re gonna hate it. You even WANT to hate it because, you know, it�s Manilow�and he�s such a cheeseball Vegas-type middle-aged woman�s fantasy. But, damn it, the guy HAS written songs �that make the whole world sing.� And I�m proud to be one of them. C�mon��Mandy�..? How good is �Mandy�..? And �This One�s For You�..? And what about �Can�t Smile Without You�..?? This song is the ultimate sing-along. I think I�ll use it as my "wedding song" if I ever get married again. (And if you�ve read the above �bad date� section, you�ll know that�s completely unlikely.)
Greek Yogurt � now in �Total 0% fat� variety. My favorite brand is Fage (pronounced Fa-yeh!).
I mix it with apples, dried cranberries, walnuts, cashews, sunflower seeds and a drizzle of honey. OMG�that is one tasty (and healthy) breakfast treat! 
Okay�so that�s enough of MY favorite things for now. Tell me about some of yours. Don�t wimp out on me! I�ll understand if you�re a secret Neil Diamond fan. Or if you cry at the end of Wuthering Heights (I do!). Or if you really, really love the Golden Girls re-runs. Or Kraft Macaroni-n-Cheese. So, �fess up, pal�I�m dying to hear about your faves.
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