2005-06-21 - 10:51 p.m.

I know it�s hard to believe�but women can be crazy, too�sometimes. A male friend of mine recently had a Match.com blind date with a woman�let�s call her E. They met at his favorite new dating destination�the Art Bar in Greenwich Village. Having screened her profile, I mentioned to my friend that E. sounded like a bit of a �desperado��you know, those women just past 40 who suddenly realize that their lives are meaningless�and childless. The profile spoke about �marriage not being a priority� for her, about her �not being interested in intimacy until I�m sure we�re on the same page��but wanting to have a baby �sooner than later.� I told my friend that she sounded sorta crazy to me�and that I thought she should go to a sperm bank�not on a date. Oh yeah�and twice she mentioned that she liked to �talk about ideas,� and I wondered how she felt about notions, concepts or inklings, but I digress. She also hated cologne (that was the most useful thing in her profile), and since my friend wouldn�t wear cologne even if he was forced to spend the night in a garbage dump at gun point, they agreed to meet.

Anyway, they met for drinks on Saturday night at 8, which I always think is an awkward time for a drinks date�b/c it�s actually dinner time. Does it mean that the guy presumes you�ll eat dinner before hand? Is he too cheap to suggest dinner? Then again, blind date dinners are risky b/c your date could turn out to be really boring after one drink�and then you�re stuck with them for an hour-and-a-half. God forbid they order an appetizer and dessert�and you could be trapped for over two hours. On the other hand, if you meet for drinks at 6:30 or 7 p.m., and the person turns out to be fun and engaging, then the option for dinner at 8 or 8:30 is still viable. Does this make sense?

Well, for my friend and E., things were weird right from the get go. She mentioned that she was a freelance designer of some kind, that both her parents had been psychiatrists, that she grew up in Manhattan, and that when her parents died, they left her an enormous three-bedroom apartment on Central Park West. She also told him that she desperately wanted a baby�RIGHT AWAY�and if he wasn�t into that, there was no point in continuing the date. She mentioned that she was actually trying to have a baby with another Match.com candidate (or two), but there were �complications.� Really?

So after about a half-hour of weirdness, E. goes to the ladies� room. When she emerges five minutes later, she says she has to leave �right now,� turns on her stilettos, and walks out the door�leaving my friend with the check�and a �what the fuck� expression on his face. He paid up�and was back in his apartment by 9 p.m�just one hour later, just one more Manhattan nut case.

Given my recent experiences in dating hell, I have to admit it was damn encouraging to know that men don�t ALWAYS have it made in the shade. And in the end, my friend and I have lots of laughs and another great story to share over bowls of Japanese noodle soup.


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